Continuous Writing – From “I Can’t” to “I Can”

“I can’t write,” “I hate to write,” “I’m not a good writer,” “I don’t know what to write,” “Writing is hard.” These are all phrases I hear from students and people out and about in the world I bumble around inside, especially when those folks discover my occupation. “Oh, you’re an English Professor; I better clean up the way I talk,” or “I’d do terrible in that class; I can’t write,” they say apologetically and with much insecurity. Without fail, I say, “Oh please, anyone can be a writer, and if you took my class, I’d prove it to you.”

Anyone can be a writer. I believe that. In “On Writing,” Stephen King said, “Take any noun, put it with any verb, and you have a sentence. It never fails. Rocks explode. Jane transmits. Mountains float.” Wa-la, you’re writing. At its core, it’s not that complicated. You have thoughts. Write them down. Do you have more thoughts? Write those down too. You have no thoughts? Write that down. Write whatever is in your head. Write about having nothing in your head. I’m getting ahead of myself. Most folks, when told it’s time to write, absolutely freeze. Freeze or internally weep. Our problem is that somewhere along the way, someone said something that caused you to feel inadequate. And that inadequacy turned into the lies we tell ourselves about ourselves in the form of “I can’t,” which becomes “I won’t.”

I address this in my classes by talking about Word Vomit. As I talk about letting whatever is in your mind and your heart flood the page, a baby spews on the presentation screen behind me. The visual “helps” the students get this idea of word vomit into their heads. Spill yourself onto the paper before you or the keyboard in front of you, whichever it is. They’ll never forget that baby! Chuck Wendig, a writer and blogger I enjoy, calls it, in his article “25 of My Personal Rules for Writing and Telling Stories,” “Bleeding on the Page.” When I discuss his angle on continuous writing with the students, there’s a bloody spill on the screen behind me; in his article, he says to cut yourself open and color your words with your heartsblood! Here, he says it best:

“Don’t write purely to escape pain and fear. Mine it. Extract those wretched little nuggets of hard black hate-coal and use them to fuel the writing of a scene, a chapter, maybe the whole goddamn book. Cut yourself open. Color the words with your heartsblood. I am an advocate of finding the things you fear and opening old wounds to let them splash onto the characters and inform the tale at hand. We’ll know. We’ll feel it, too. This is where your experience matters — it’s not necessarily in the nitty-gritty of mechanical experience but rather in the authenticity of your emotional life. And this is true for the opposite, as well — write about the things that thrill you, that stir hope, that deliver unto you paroxysms of tingly exultation. Be true to yourself and we’ll all grok your lingo, Daddy-O.”

Bleed on the page. Word Vomit. Imagery does wonders for belief. Any of us can pour ourselves out in freewriting—absolutely anyone. My friend, Dr. Douglas Price – the Director of Faculty Development and Global Learning at Tulsa Community College- has recently developed a tool for continuous writing that he and another friend of mine, Professor Amy Rains, are fine-tuning and collecting data on. They received a DaVinci Institute award for their work this past year. Since then, I have gleefully welcomed Dr. Price to my classrooms to share his insights and incredible tool, which assists students in continuous writing – and beyond that, continuous thought.

The practice is continuous writing, without stopping, just letting words and thoughts flow. If you get “stuck” in the writing, have a keyword to fall back on and write that word continuously until a new idea pops into your mind, which you will then write and keep going! Something I like to do is write about being stuck, if I get stuck. When I have had “writer’s block,” I’ve written about it—the feelings involved, the frustration, the despair … and then I have some golden, authentic emotions I can give to a character at another time. Writing our authentic internal thoughts is excellent for multiple reasons: it teaches us to keep going, it frees us to stop worrying about what others will think, it shakes us clear of concern about mistakes and editing. Just write. No stopping. Go. Go. Go. Get it out. Write without stopping; we practice this in freewriting, rough draft writing, journaling, anywhere you need to get words from your head onto a page.

Dr. Price visited my classrooms this week, and we, the students and I (because I love to participate along with them), practiced Dr. Price’s tool for continuous writing. During this visit, he specifically had us focus on comparisons. Take two words that have nothing to do with one another and see where your mind takes you as you continuously write. No stopping, just writing, and if you get stuck, write about it, or use a keyword to repeat until a new thought appears.

What follows are my freewriting examples from our exercises. I’m pleased with the results, as were the students pleased with their own. All of these students, who weeks ago, before my class, and the words from King, Wendig, and me, along with Dr. Price’s two visits to the classroom, used to say, “I can’t,” which meant, “I won’t.” Now … they can, and they have, and they will.

Nametag & Parachute

They found it on the ground, not far from the parachute. Her nametag. It lay in the mud, surrounded by remnants of this and that, things unmentionable due to the tragedy of the accident. The parachute had not opened … and she plummeted to her death. The newspaper would tell all the details, but for now, standing in the midst of it, the coroner just stared at the nametag. Chelsea. Her name was Chelsea Street. A young woman, it appeared. Probably full of life and laughter, excited to jump from a plane for the first time. Or maybe she was an expert and had done this many times, only this time, the chute did not open. Time would reveal that information to the CSI team, but the coroner’s job at this moment was to observe the body, so she took her attention from the nametag which was an embroidered piece of fabric that still semi-clung to the jacket that lay a few feet from where Chelsea’s body lay indented into the ground.

“Sandy, take a look at this,” said a young man crouched near the body. His name was Dan, and he was her newest assistant. Most didn’t stay with her long; she didn’t understand why, but she had come to accept the revolving door.

Sandy stepped closer to the body, and she looked down at the woman whose life had tragically ended that morning. How did this happen, Chelsea? Did the chute not open as it should? She waited and, before long, Chelsea spoke to her only in a voice no one could hear but her. “I didn’t open it.” The coroner heard the words, let them sink in a moment, and asked, “You did this on purpose?” Chelsea replied, “Yes.” And Sandy knew the CSI would find no flaws in the chute.

Snail & Dumpster

It was a long way to the top, but Herbert kept going. He knew the ‘promised land’ would await him once he reached the top. He had heard about the inside of the giant thing from some flies that he knew, though his parents told him not to associate with the flies. They were bad seeds, his dad said. But Herbie wanted to find out what was on the other side, or even better, on the inside of the giant thing. One of the flies had called it a dumpster; Herbie had seen it plenty of times but never knew its name. It was unmentionable. Something his parents ignored, even though it was larger than life.

Stick to the rocks. Stick to the shoreline. Don’t go on the concrete. Don’t go where the people go. Stay safe. Herbie didn’t want to play it safely. He tried to “LIVE.” You know, like the flies. He wished he had wings instead of this shell. Being a snail restrained him. He didn’t like carrying around the weight of his room all day, every day. He wanted to sprout wings and be a fly, though he heard that snails lived longer than flies, so there was that. But heck, even in their short lives, they got to see things that snails never did … and so, that morning, Herbert had kissed his mother and told her he was going to snail school, only he didn’t go. He made his way to the concrete and slowly took his first slide onto the hard surface, not knowing how it would feel. It wasn’t so bad, so he kept going, and before long, though the sun had fully changed positions, he looked up and saw the giant dumpster before him. It was even bigger up close, and his heart swelled with excitement. At the top, he saw flies flying around, doing what they do, and he tried calling out, “Hey, guys! Hey, flies!” But no one heard him, so he found a spot where he could begin his climb, and Herbie began edging upward. So far. At some point, a fly noticed him and whizzed past him …

Cauliflower & Guitar

He strummed the guitar no more than five feet from me. The music was soft, and I was sleepy. I needed to wake up. Something, anything. And then, my food arrived. So grateful for something to do – you know, feed my face. And … there was cauliflower on my plate next to my steak. I did not order cauliflower. Gross. It’s one of the nastiest substances on this planet; I will not eat it. But I don’t want to cause a scene. This place is quiet except for the lullaby floating around in the space from that man’s infernal guitar. He plays on and on, and I think this concert is for senior citizens.

Looking around, no, there aren’t any of those here, but I seem to be the only person squirming in my seat because the music is so dull! My husband seems content with the food on his plate. His steak and broccoli sit there ready to become one with him, as they usually do when he orders them. It’s a routine, and he is happy. But they gave me cauliflower. Ugh. I can’t eat it anyway – even if I wanted to. Which I don’t. So … what to do with it? Everyone is distracted here. No one is paying attention to me. I wonder … I could break the cauliflower into little pieces and try to toss it inside the guitar. He’s only 5 feet away … I bet I could make it. I’m a basketball player after all. Naturally, I will think of making a basket!

Boat & Cello

My favorite piece of music is “The River Flows in You” – especially when done by Hauser, a member of the group 2 Cellos. His video for “The River Flowers in You” is filmed in a boat on a river, and he beautifully plays the melody on his cello. It is mournful, almost, and the setting sweeps me into emotional flow every time I hear it. It seeps into every fiber of my being, and I am on that river, not with Hauser, but alone … I am there, and I am sad, and I am content. I am hopeful, and I am relaxed, and I am mourning … so many things all wrapped up as the music soars through me and the water gently moves me along. They work in tandem with one another – I lie back in the boat and float on a sea of emotion, but gentle emotion, taking me to a place of serenity where I can be open and free and not have worries or concerns. It is a release, and I long for that at all times. I will play “The River Flows in You” with intent from time to time because I need that music. I need that song … in cello, and I remember the river. I am in that boat, and Hauser plays the melody, and I drift … drifting, drifting … ever down the river of emotion but gentle emotion, soft and sweet, though a tint of mournfulness because Life is serious … Life is to be lived and we are to rest and we are to exult and we are to be in the moment, and in this moment, I am all of those things. I want to be in this boat …

Curtain & Trees

She pulled back the curtains to let in the day. The morning light spilled in and lit the room. Her eyes adjusted, and she flipped the latch to unlock the window. She heaved because the window was heavy and opened it, allowing the fresh morning air to rush into her bedroom. Ahhhhhh. The morning. There is nothing like morning. Nothing smells like morning. Especially here in the mountains. She smiled and looked out of the window at the forest surrounding her cabin. The mountain rose in the distance beyond the trees, and a few hawks circled above it all. She wanted to be nowhere but right here. A day lay ahead of her where she would play in the sunshine, wander through the trees, explore the base of the mountain, and perhaps skip rocks on the river. No pressure. No worries. No concerns. No sounds just birds, water trickling, and a car’s tires on gravel … Wait, that’s not the sound she should hear. The sound grew louder, and a car came into view – coming down the gravel drive set between dark rows of trees that overhung the simple road. It was her grandfather’s truck, and she wasn’t ready for his bellowing. Maybe she could pretend to be asleep. He’d get what he needed and leave. She pulled the curtains closed a bit and hid behind one of them, hoping he hadn’t seen her in the window. She was not in the mood to listen to any of his stories or help him hunt for this or for that that he left in the kitchen or the garage. It was always something. At those thoughts, she chided herself. He meant well. He always meant well. It wasn’t his fault that he had no volume level other than loud. Bless his heart. He’s hard of hearing … she pulled herself together, slipped on her flip-flops …

Mirror & Trains

She glanced in the mirror and adjusted her hair. A few strands were loosened from the wind outside near the train stop. She wanted to be presentable. No, she needed to be presentable. It has been two years since she last saw him. How has time flown like that? It is cruel, time. She saw the lines in her face were deeper, and she hoped he wouldn’t notice. She hoped that when he saw her, his eyes would light up and time would disappear. She kept looking at herself in the mirror and wondered how life had brought them to this space – to be so distant but love so hard. It was also cruel. Life. The mirror. All of it. He had to take a train. Trains make so many stops, and the time stretches far beyond what a plane ride would take. Even what a car would produce. And so, it was the train, and time is cruel. She wiped a piece of loose mascara from near her eye and took a deep breath. Two years. Okay. You can do this. Her heart raced. Her hands were a bundle of nerves. She hoped he was just as anxious to see her, but she also didn’t wish feeling this anxiety on him, hoping he was happy and on an adventure. Who knows what they would do with their time? She hadn’t made a plan. She wanted whatever time they had together to be spontaneous. She left the restroom and made her way to the train platform outside, again in the wind, and the strands of hair she had corrected chose their own freedom and flew with wild abandonment in the air. The train whistle sounded, and she stared down the track … hoping this was his train! But another train whizzed past. Not stopping. Ah, the anxiety. And then, another train came into view … and she prayed this was the one. It was time. It was time, ten minutes ago, but that time is cruel … and so, she waited. She watched, and the train came to a stop. Passengers filed off, and she strained to see him. Desperate to see him, but he wasn’t there. Where was he? Person after person filed past her, and her heart sank. Maybe he had decided not to come. He didn’t want to see her after all. Her hopes dashed, but she understood. She understood that he hadn’t desired to prioritize her in his life after she had left all those years ago.

Why would he? She understood. She crossed her arms, rubbed her hands against her skin, and sighed. Deeply. No one else remained to come off the train, and she turned to walk back into the sanctuary of the bustling train station, where she could disappear into the people and not be noticed in her sorrow and shame. Out in the air, on the platform, she felt a neon sign flashing above her saying, “Look at that mother who left her son years ago! She doesn’t deserve his love!” But you don’t know my story, she wanted to shout back at the sign and the people and the air.

You Might Be An Alcoholic If …

Have you ever purchased a 24-pack of water, snuck it into your house, hid it in the closet, and drank it alone?

No?

You do that with alcohol though?

Ah, yes. There it is.

This post is brief. My husband said this in a meeting, or something very close to it, last night. The whole place laughed, but each of us in attendance knew its truth. No alcoholic buys a 24-pack of water, sneaks it into the house, hides it in the closet, and drinks it alone. We do that or have done that with alcohol.

If this is you, AA meetings are in almost every town across this country and worldwide. A quick internet search for “AA meetings near me” will locate groups for you to check out. Find your people … those who find the water situation funny but know its tragedy. Know the loneliness of the progression of alcoholism and that it winds us up alone with alcohol and/or substances ( and what we call ‘outside issues’), having burned our lives to the ground or very close to it.

There is hope.

Maybe one day, on the side of recovery, you will purchase a 24-pack of water and smile because it’s not alcohol, and you will be open to sharing your story, and your water, with others.

A Despicable 4-Letter Word

To say 4-letter word usually evokes an F-bomb in the mind, but that’s not the word I’m disgusted by. Over time, I’ve come to appreciate the appropriate use of a strong f*#k in making a point. Overusing that word is an unknown tragedy to its users because it doesn’t land how they think it does. It becomes routine to their vocabulary and thus just indicative of someone who doesn’t pay much attention to their word choices, much less the power behind them. To me, this very point leads to the 4-letter word I despise.

Lazy.

It’s not the word itself; it’s just a word. It’s what the word indicates about people—an attribute or characteristic I do not understand nor can I abide by, and it is all around me—us. It’s everywhere, like a contagious infection, festering and spreading through whatever is out there that traps people into doing nothing productive or caring that they’re doing nothing productive.

Never do I ever want lazy to be a word that describes my character. Since I was a kid, I’ve been go, go, go like my sweet momma was. I’m going to figure it out. I’m going to be busy and productive. I’m competitive, and I love a challenge. I’m independent-spirited and never lazy. When I see laziness, I recoil internally, and I thank God that I am who I am, realizing I am not without faults because I have those in abundance, but laziness is not one.

This is on my mind today because there is a young generation of folks just entering their twenties who are content to be lazy, and I do not understand. I started working when I was 16, and I have ever since. In my stay-at-home mom years, I ran a home daycare—caring for my own growing brood of 6 and many other children over a twelve-year period when I rarely sat down. Around 35 years old, I went back to school and achieved my master’s degree,e all while working full-time, assisting with operations for a lawncare/tree service, and raising six children. Again, I’m not saying I did any of those things well, but I was not lazy. I worked. I want to earn the things I have; it feels good to do so.

Ranting, I suppose. Regardless, I don’t understand laziness; I find it abhorrent. Now, to be fair, I know that conflict avoidance is something I have to work on …

Momma’s Fruit Salad – Family Recipe – a Favorite. “Tastes Like Home” – Dad.

This fruit salad recipe is in honor of my mother, Marjorie Ruth Snare Hinkle, who made it regularly before she passed away in November 2022. For years, I tried to duplicate it (even calling her and asking for help) but never could—until now.

Figured out, excitedly eaten, and written down by Dacia Lene’ Hinkle Cunningham (Me).

“It tastes like home,” said Dacia’s dad, David Hinkle.

**INGREDIENTS**

6 Tbsp. Mayonnaise

3 Tbsp Milk

3 Tbsp Sugar

3 Apples

4 Bananas

1 Tbsp Lemon Juice

1 Cup Cranberries

2 Cups mini marshmallows

1 Cup Pecans

Chop apples into the desired size for a fruit salad. Cut bananas into the desired size. Add all other ingredients. Put bananas, apples, cranberries, marshmallows, and pecans in a large bowl. Mix Lemon Juice into the bowl. After mixing with lemon juice, top the mixture with mayonnaise, milk, and sugar. Mix all items until the mayonnaise, milk, and sugar fully coat the bananas, apples, cranberries, marshmallows, and pecans. Cover and refrigerate until ready to eat.

ENJOY!

Dad and I sure do!

Cowboy Dressing Recipe – Cornbread Base … Family Recipe

**Cowboy Dressing Recipe** – Dacia Cunningham

**Ingredients:**

– 2 boxes of cornbread mix

– ½ cup chopped jalapeños

– ½ onion, chopped

– 48 oz chicken broth

– 26 oz cream of chicken soup

– 2 eggs

– ½ lb ground hamburger, cooked and crumbled

– ½ lb bacon, cooked and crumbled

– 1 ½ cups shredded cheese (your choice)

– 1 can of corn, drained

– 3 tbsp taco seasoning, salsa seasoning, or Mexican seasoning

– Salt and pepper to taste

**Instructions:**

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Spray or oil the bottom of a 13” x 9” baking pan with non-stick spray.

Prepare the cornbread according to the box instructions, adding the chopped onion and jalapeños. Bake as directed.

While the cornbread is baking, cook the ground hamburger and bacon (you can use more or less if desired; I opted for ½ lb of each). Set aside after cooking.

Once the cornbread has finished baking, crumble it into the prepared baking pan.

Mix the chicken broth, cream of chicken soup, and eggs in a large bowl. Whisk until smooth.

Add the drained corn, 1 cup of shredded cheese, cooked ham, crumbled bacon, and the crumbled cornbread to the bowl. Mix well.

Season the mixture with salt, pepper, and your choice of taco, salsa, or Mexican seasoning. Combine thoroughly. The consistency should be somewhat sloppy; you want it to be moist but not dry.

Pour the mixture into the baking pan.

Bake for 45 minutes to 1 hour or until the top is light brown. Sprinkle the remaining shredded cheese on top and bake for an additional 5 minutes.

Ensure that a fork inserted in the middle comes out clean. Once removed from the oven, let the dressing sit for a few minutes to solidify.

Enjoy as a side dish or a main entrée.

Mexican Casserole – A Family Favorite

Mexican Casserole – Dacia Cunningham

1 bag of tostada shells OR 1 bag of tortilla chips

2 cans of diced green chilies (Sometimes I use Ro-Tell)

1 medium to large onion

Shredded cooked chicken (breast or thigh) – Cook & save broth.

1 bag frozen corn OR 1 can corn

1 can Cream of Chicken soup (prepared according to directions)

Chicken broth (from cooking chicken)

2 to 4 cups shredded cheese (taste depending – I use a LOT of cheese)

Seasonings – optional and at the cook’s discretion.

Set oven to 350. Pre-heat.
Grease the bottom of a 13” x9” casserole dish.
The casserole is layered, so try to dispense ¼ of each item in each layer.
Cover the bottom of the dish with a layer of tortilla chips or tostada shells.
Cover the tortilla chips/tostada shells with a layer of ¼ of each: onion, green chilies, cooked shredded chicken, frozen corn, shredded cheese, and soup.
Top this layer with a soup can full of chicken broth.
Repeat layers beginning with chips/tostada shells.
After all 4 layers are complete, add more cheese if you desire. Personally, I like it cheesy, so I add more to the top layer. Sometimes, I add seasonings like garlic, pepper, or Tajin; sometimes, I don’t. This recipe is mood-dependent for me. 

Bake at 350 for 30 minutes.

This recipe is a base. The original recipe was my mother’s (Marjorie Ruth Snare Hinkle), which did not include the chicken or the corn. She would fry corn tortillas in a skillet, then make the casserole with those. That’s too much work for me. Lol. I use tortilla chips or tostada shells. Sometimes, I use Ro-tell and cut back on the green chilies. Sometimes, I use both. It depends on the flavor I’m going for. The essential components of chips, cheese, soup, and onions must all be there … the rest of the items I play with and change it up. It could be made with hamburger or chunks of pork. Whatever you’re in the mood for. This is a family favorite for us. My husband wants me to make it once a week. At least. Enjoy!

The Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis, Alcoholism, & Sanity.

The following Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis results are from 1992 when I was 19. They show I was 97% Nervous, 92% Depressive, 98% Active-Social, 75% Inhibited, 62% Sympathetic, 98% Subjective, 70% Submissive, 88% Hostile, and 82% Impulsive – in 7 “Needs Improvement” zones out of 9 total zones; these “Needs Improvement” zones are what I have called, danger zones when I share this information with others. Let’s look at those again:

Ozark Christian College placed me in mandatory counseling after I took the Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis at their behest. It’s shocking to me now to review these results, which I’ve kept all of these years, as I come to understand more and more about Alcoholism being a soul-sickness in which only a relationship with a higher power (for me, that is God) can course-correct—the only answer. My Alcoholism is no surprise in retrospect; I was an alcoholic years before my first drink at age 32. This is evidenced in these TJTA results. I was not okay at 19 years old, before 19, and after 19 because the counseling didn’t last, and I slipped through the cracks, left to my own devices because I could ‘hide’ it, my internal chaos, well. The internal me was in constant chaos – for years. I didn’t know that was abnormal, though it appeared that no one else felt the way I did inside – sad, alone, unable to speak for myself, angry … hostile.

The hole inside of me was deep, and I tried many ways to fill it over the years. At different points, I took anti-depressants like Prozac and Celexa, a good portion of that time also drinking alcohol. I went to counselors and therapists, the psych ward twice. I was labeled with Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar, and PTSD. Alcohol was a ‘solution’ that ‘fixed’ me at the moment a few times early on, and I felt “okay” here and there. Try as I might chase that “I’m okay” feeling in the ensuing 16 years, alcohol became the elusive ‘solution’ that fixed nothing and made everything much, much worse. I couldn’t understand that until I came face-to-face with myself in the 12 Steps of AA. I suppose I keep these Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis results because I’m reminded of how far I’ve come when I look at them. I know that the woman I am today has recovered from insanity and soul-sickness, no longer chasing a “feel good” solution to quench the thirst for God in my soul, which Solomon speaks of in Ecclesiastes 3:11. “He has made everything beautiful and appropriate in its time. He has also planted eternity [a sense of divine purpose] in the human heart [a mysterious longing which nothing under the sun can satisfy, except God]—yet man cannot find out (comprehend, grasp) what God has done (His overall plan) from the beginning to the end.” Today, I fill the hole inside me with God the Father, and I am whole.

I’m considering getting the Taylor Johnson Temperament Analysis Certification to administer and interpret the assessment for others … and myself. I’m interested to see current results for myself. However, I don’t need to do that. Curious, yes, but necessary, no. Step two of the AA program says, “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” Ah, sanity. The words “restore us to” make me giggle because I’m not sure I’ve ever been ‘sane’ before the last year. Today, I am sane. I am recovered. I no longer exist in those ‘danger’ zones, and God’s got me. Every day, I am grateful to Him for this life I live, and I ask Him to help me be of use to Him as I walk through each day. What an excellent way to live. #grateful #gratefultobeanalcoholic #Godsgotme

The thought “You’re oversharing” just ran through my mind in a particular couple of people’s voices, and I had a moment of thinking I’d scrap this whole post. But I did not do that. I won’t do that. I am convicted and convinced that I am to share about these things that I’ve overcome in my life because they have been defeated by God’s power, not my own. Hope exists. My experiences prove this. Today, I take no anti-depressants. The only medications I take are for my heart. I am finally sane. I am a child of the Living God, and I am a grateful member of Alcoholics Anonymous, where we follow these steps:

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

https://www.aa.org/the-twelve-steps

Alcoholism & Amazing Grace

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest of me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NIV.

My alcoholism began when I was very young; I exhibited alcoholic behaviors well before I ever took my first sip of an alcoholic drink, which was a strawberry daiquiri at Kobe Steakhouse in St. Louis, MO. The warm, fuzzy feeling it gave me was a sensation I wanted to replicate over and over. I chased that feeling for 16 years … leaving in my wake damage and chaos that I can never return and course correct. I can, however, move forward today, understanding myself and God’s grace, making amends, and making myself available each day for God to use as He wills.

What alcoholic behaviors did I exhibit? Unreasonable/irrational fear – 100 forms of it. Placing blame on others/always being the victim. Having trouble communicating with people. Making frequent excuses. Shifting priorities. Behaving recklessly. Insecurity. Impulsivity. Impatience. Secretiveness. Defensiveness. Manipulation. Easily aggravated. Emotionally unstable. Prone to isolation. Always seeking approval. Codependency. Obsessiveness/Compulsiveness. Being the Center of attention. Mood swings from deep depression to extreme happiness. Anxiety. Believing I always knew what was best. Refusing to accept constructive criticism. Inability to cope with circumstances. Negative beliefs about myself and my life.

I viewed myself as a blob that no one really cared about, and alcohol changed these things for me … so I thought. When I drank, I could forget it all … not feel any of those things … pass out, and just sleep it all away. My behaviors were reckless, and I was on a suicide mission, though I was too chicken to actually take my own life, but if it came at the hand of another or falling off a motorcycle, which I fantasized about, so be it. I’ll never forget a particular moment when my ability to breathe had been cut off by another, and I gave up fighting and lay there unable to breathe. I remember thinking, “Jesus, take me.” I wanted out of life. Desperately. I hated myself.

My ‘weaknesses’ consumed me … all coming from a soul-sickness, self-centeredness best discussed on page 62 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, which states, “Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity? Selfishness – self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows, and they retaliate. Sometimes, they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past, we have made decisions based on self, which later placed us in a position to be hurt. So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn’t think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God’s help. This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.”

I have come to understand that my alcoholism comes from a powerless, self-centered soul sickness that can only be healed in dependence upon the power of God. Often, I hear other alcoholics say they are grateful to be alcoholics, and I completely agree. Why? Because this soul-sickness that we so desperately tried to treat with alcohol and reckless behaviors once healed leads the alcoholic to a full dependence on God the Father to maintain recovery – and time and again, it is in recovered alcoholics who have been in the depths of depravity and found themselves rescued by God’s grace, that I see authenticity in a true relationship with God. The understanding that without God, we are lost, sinks into a recovered alcoholic in a way I’ve not encountered in churches or Bible studies through my 52 years. The desperation of an alcoholic opens their hearts and minds to a reliance on God that can only happen when the self is depleted and admission of powerlessness and weaknesses occurs.

I think the devil fights alcoholics and addicts harder than most because he knows that once an alcoholic is recovered by dependence upon the Power of God the Father, there is no stopping the recovered alcoholic from spreading the message of that which and WHO saved them! We have experienced God’s grace to its fullest and been brought out of literal, often self-inflicted, hell to proclaim …

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I’m found
Was blind, but now I see

‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed

Through many dangers, toils, and snares
We have already come
‘Twas grace that brought us safe thus far
And grace will lead us home

When we’ve been there ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we’ve first begun
Than when we’ve first begun

Amen.

This Scripture popped up on my phone today – from YouVersion, and these were the thoughts that came from reading these beautiful words. I’m so grateful to God for this life I live now. I’m grateful for each day, and I’m grateful for His power made perfect in my weakness. I am thankful for His Grace.

Keyboard Warrior – Critical Thinking, Immigration, Courage, Cancelation, & Me.

Keyboard Warrior is not a title I choose for myself, but I want to state something on my mind right now, and I’ll get around to it. But first, I find it sad that I hesitate to write this, much less post it. We live in a world where some have a right to voice their opinions, and others don’t … unless they’re up for the being canceled or yelled at situations. Some choose not to voice their opinions because they see sharing opinionated thoughts as a lack of propriety or a breach of privacy. I’ve been told I overshare, which is funny because I don’t voice many thoughts regarding politics. However, I’m sure that was about some personal matters that particular individuals don’t like for me to talk about online. My perspective is this: if something in my story helps someone else to be brave, then what I went through and have become willing to be honest and vulnerable about is worth it. I will not be silent on matters such as alcoholism, emotional sobriety, loving your neighbor as yourself, recovery from major surgery, and speaking up for yourself when you’re in an abusive situation; there is life beyond what feels hopeless. I will not hesitate to write about any of those things; there are other topics, though, that I feel strongly about, and most often, I keep my thoughts to myself for a variety of reasons. A couple of those are that I see a lack of communication skills and a lack of value for/respect for opposing perspectives in the realm of social media – and in the workplace.

I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m going to state it again because I still find it shocking. At the height of the COVID panic, I was ‘friends’ on Facebook with multiple co-workers; I am not any longer because I’ll never forget reading, “They should all be shot in the head so that the good people can get on with their lives” on a co-worker’s Facebook thread. My co-worker agreed. Wow, thought I. They’d both be okay with my death … so that they, the “good” people, can go on with life. Until that “good” sect of folks ran into some issue on which there existed a disagreement and another killing off of “bad” people would occur … Perhaps this is a slippery slope, but I don’t think so. It is common sense.

I’ll never forget reading those words, and I’m watchful of that individual and of others. I hold different perspectives than the majority of folks I work with … and although many of them bring their opinions to work and put them on display in emails and meetings, I keep my own neatly tucked in my heart and mind because they do not belong at work. Our task is to teach students to think critically… sometimes I’m concerned about higher ed because we are contracted to teach critical thinking skills, but many complete this task with an emphasis on particular belief systems being the only “right” track instead of showing students the necessity of viewing multiple perspectives with an open mind and a respect for different opinions.

A truth taught in my classrooms is when emotion enters a conversation, it is no longer a conversation or true argument. It is at that point the beginning of a fight, of cancellation, of separation between people, dividing us … it’s sad, and it is a tragedy that people would rather spout angry words, cancel, shut out/shut down than listen, and try to understand where another person is coming from. I ponder this and conclude that my hesitation to share my thoughts/opinions (outside of work because I will not be convinced that work is a place where I can bring personal beliefs and opinions) is one of three things or a combination of each.

I prefer to avoid conflict, which states that I have a lack of courage.
I prefer to avoid conflict, which is because all roads lead back to my career, and that is something I will not jeopardize.
I prefer to avoid conflict, which states that I value people over opinions. However, this third one makes me wonder if I am unwilling to speak my truth to others, does that then show a lack of care and concern for them on my part? Am I feigning niceness? Perhaps that depends on the issue at hand. Perhaps.

I’m still determining why I hesitate to speak my mind on matters outside of the issues I have no compunction about sharing from my soul—those charged issues that fall in the political spectrum specifically, I hesitate upon. However, on the issue of immigration, because it hits close to home, I think I will voice my opinion.

My son-in-law is an immigrant; he entered this country legally. He went through the required procedures because he is a respectful man who wanted to work in America. I applaud and support him and any who respect our nation and abide by its rules. I have a former student who is German; she also came to the United States through the correct channels to attend college. I have a friend who is of Kurdish descent from Iraq. Her family fled Iraq years ago on foot into Turkey and ended up in St. Louis through legal channels. She now speaks better English than most of us who grew up in the USA. She loves this country because she knows what it is like to live under real, and not perceived, oppression. Our First Lady is a former immigrant who went through legal channels to be here. To each of these people and to anyone who respects our nation and its laws, I welcome you!

Millions of immigrants in this country, however, chose to come in illegally. This is not right. It does not matter how “nice” they are. That is an argument I’ve heard regarding why undocumented people should be allowed to remain … they are “nice.” If they’re here illegally, they’ve broken our laws, and therefore, they are criminals according to our laws. Nice or not. Some people want to argue that undocumented immigrants add to our economy. To this, I say our government has been giving them money instead of spending our tax dollars on what the citizens of this nation, like the North Carolina flood victims, need. I do not understand how this is not a black-and-white issue for every citizen of this nation. America First. There is a system in place for legal migration to the USA. Does it take a while? Yes, it does. Is it flawed? Yes, it is. Does that mean it is to be disregarded? No, it does not.

If these people who are here illegally that our tax dollars are taking care of – just this past week, it was discovered that $59 million in tax dollars had been used by USAID to put illegal immigrants up in hotels in New York City – did not abide by our immigration laws and come here by correct means; doesn’t that also indicate that there will be continued disrespect for our rule of law? Absolutely. This can be seen in protests happening across this nation where undocumented immigrants are flying the flags of their nations of origin. There is a great lack of common sense here. If the nation you left to come here is so bad, why do you fly their flag inside our borders as if you want to bring that nation here … maybe that is the goal …. Maybe that is exactly what is happening. If so, it’s an invasion, and America is in danger of losing itself. All of this said, I realize some of the undocumented people are here for a better life, not nefarious purposes, and to them, I say, if you are so happy to come to the United States, do it correctly, abide by our laws with respect, and fly our flag. Pretty simple concept. One that almost every other nation on earth enforces through imprisonment and/or deportation.

Anyway, now I ask myself if I feel better having written this out, and to a degree, yes. But overall, no. I just want to get along with people and not let politics divide us. I want to be able to do my job without politics creeping into it. I want to treat others the way I wish to be treated and receive that same consideration in return. It makes me sad that this is often now how things work. It makes me sad to know that I’m a person that another individual would be happy to shoot in the head for having a different political belief. I don’t understand this in human nature, and it makes me long for my heavenly home.

Maranatha. Come, Lord Jesus.

Career Advice from 72 Students in Mrs. C’s Comp II Courses – Spring 2025.

The assignment was “Consider life up to this point and what Career Advice you have encountered. Write an essay in which you determine the most helpful advice you’ve received – whether it was spoken to you, or you read it somewhere/heard it in a TED Talk, etc. Come up with three pieces of advice that have been helpful. You will share about these in 1,250 words – keeping the most helpful as the third main point of the essay.”

It was essay #1, which assesses where Comp II students stand with writing skills and proficiency before the course is fully underway. It establishes for me, the Professor, where we are beginning and gives me the information necessary to know how best to proceed as I keep course outcomes and my goals for student achievement at the forefront.

The outcome of this writing assignment, which spread over five Comp II courses, astounded me. Seventy-two students wrote passionately about the career and life advice they’d been given by parents, employers, coworkers, books, articles, mentors, singers, TEDx presentations, video games, friends, etc., how the advice affected them, and how it could benefit others. After several essays, I decided to track the collected advice in one document – one I could share with the students after I completed grading all five classes. I expected it to be a couple of pages, maybe three, with most advice being repetitive that I would combine to save space. This is NOT what occurred. The result of this collection of career advice is incredible! For the most part, student after student wrote out unique and equally valuable career and life advice, and according to Word, it is eight pages long in its single-spaced and bulleted format. .5” margins. Garamond font. 12 pt. Over 4,400 words of career advice. These are in no particular order. Nuggets of golden advice exist throughout – and for each of us, what a golden nugget is could be different. That’s the beauty of it and why I’m sharing it.

“The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself” (Oscar Wilde).

For anonymity’s sake, the student’s names are not shared, but if any of the advice contained in this document is helpful and something you’d like to quote elsewhere, here is a Works Cited page citation suggestion.

Cunningham, D. L. (2025, January 31). Career Advice – Collection of Student Insight from 72 Essays in Mrs. Cunningham’s Comp II Courses – Spring 2025.

Career Advice from 72 Students in Professor C’s Comp II Courses – Spring 2025.

Keep track of everything you try and what you accomplish.
Figure out what values are most significant to you.
Give yourself the space to change.
Let yourself try different jobs, experiment with different hobbies, and make each situation you face a learning experience.
Surround yourself with a community.
Make sure to serve others.
Make a difference in the lives of other people.
Find meaning in your job every day.
Don’t get too comfortable; be patient because nothing is permanent.
There is always an opportunity for things to get either extremely good or extremely bad. Nevertheless, trying to make things good instead of bad is important.
Work hard.
Be patient when life gets hard.
Do what you love.
Keep smiling even through the tough times.
Be confident, and who cares what people think or say?
You are the only one who can accomplish your goals.
People can hear a smile. I may have the worst migraine and little to no sleep, but I will be smiling. It makes your day so much better. Life is hard; the last thing we need is to make it worse with a bad attitude and a frown on our face. Just keep smiling!
Don’t be afraid to say yes.
Progress is the killer of success.
Hard work beats talent.
Retire early.
Make a ton of money.
Love what you do.
Take it all in and prioritize my well-being.
Accept feedback and criticism.
Avoid being paralyzed by fear.
Set goals.
Focus on your own position.
Never let your mistakes define you.
Prioritize a work-life balance.
Be open to change.
Find passion in even the mundane tasks of work.
Pay attention to your outward appearance, personal performance, and overall presentability.
Be on time. This is paramount to respect and success. Being on time and present at practice, school, work, and any other activity proves that you respect your superiors and yourself.
Prepare for retirement early.
Strive for excellence in everything you do professionally.
Embrace the “work hard, play hard” mentality.
“Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back” (SZA).
“Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.”
Embrace your uniqueness.
How you dress is how people see you. Therefore, at your job, you should use every day to dress your best.
Treat every customer like they are the boss undercover.
Show a willingness to help and take on tasks, even when I don’t feel like it, and approach my work urgently.
Control your face and your emotions.
I am replaceable, and many people want my job, so I must always be at my best, no matter the circumstances.
When you communicate effectively, it demonstrates to your boss that you are mature, reliable, and capable of working independently.
Finding a balance between work and personal life is essential for career success.
Be able to accept feedback and take it. This shows open-mindedness and maturity.
Be positive, do your job, and do your best.
Always strive to be a great employee.
Create a meticulous schedule (meaning done perfectly and with great scrutiny towards every element).
Do tasks for my boss that they did not ask me to do.
Ask myself, “Why not me?”
Use every bit of spare time during your workday to your advantage.
“Take a gamble that love exists and do a loving act” (Red Dead Redemption 2).
“Sometimes life is like this tunnel; you can’t always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you just keep moving, you will come to a better place” (Avatar).
“After all, tomorrow is another day” (Gone with the Wind).
Make sure you make a good first impression.
Have good communication skills.
Find a job you will enjoy.
Do not compare yourself to others.
If you say you will do something, do it.
Contribute your best efforts to every project.
Maintain a positive and healthy work environment.
Find a true passion for what you do.
Plan things before you do them, stay organized, and remain focused on the task.
Never doubt themselves in anything that they do, no matter what.
Show and do my best no matter what the situation is.
Make sure I have everything ready for the next day.
Even a bad day can be turned around and flipped upside down.
Never let someone else get me down because of their bad attitude.
Understand that your strengths in the workforce is key for both personal growth and professional accomplishment.
When searching for a career, being flexible opens opportunities, unlocks new skill sets, and can sometimes provide an outlook on professional approaches to situations.
Why not learn different skills, such as electrical work, plumbing, people skills, technology, etc., even though this might not be your career choice? Growing your knowledge of many skills helps expand opportunities.
Make meaningful connections; this is especially important because, like professional flexibility, relationships often open doors to opportunities that are not advertised or widely known.
There is no shame in asking for help; it’s how we learn and grow.
Developing a solid work ethic benefits my education and leaves a lasting impression on professors, employers, and peers.
Always tell the truth.
Take initiative, even when it’s not explicitly required.
Have a good work ethic.
Find a job that pays well.
Do what you love; this is crucial.
Arrive on time; this is vital for a job as it shows a good work ethic and desire to work. Showing up late not only indicates a poor work ethic but also shows a lack of responsibility. Get to your job ten to twenty minutes early. This has helped me never be late for work.
Don’t have your nose glued to your phone. It looks bad on you and is destructive to the company. I started using this perspective at my job and avoided using my phone in front of customers to save the company’s reputation. This advice can help students understand that what you do at your job also reflects your company.
Steve Jobs once said, “Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do” (Jobs).
Make sure I am always the first one there and the last one to leave.
Work smarter, not harder.
Always put pride in everything I do.
Do not jump into anything right away; you have time to consider, so take your time.
Try to find something with a happy pay medium and personal fulfillment.
Do NOT let a paycheck decide your future.
In taking time to learn more about yourself and explore the different aspects of different careers, you can set yourself up to succeed in an environment that you have selected based on your knowledge of yourself.
Talk through demanding situations.
Work efficiently and effectively.
Prioritize work first.
“Pain creates memory.”
“Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.”
“If those other dummies can do it, so can you.” If you won’t believe in yourself, no one can believe in you. So quit being a normal ‘dummy’ and go be the better you. The you that achieves your dreams and goals without fear.
“The only thing you can control is your attitude and your effort, and the only people you need are your family and God; those are the constant things in your life.”
If my attitude is preset on being negative and I am already doubting my intelligence, I have just set the stage for myself to fail.
Work every day like people are lined up for your position.
Be the employee you would love to have on your team if you were a business owner.
Pursue the career that I truly desire. A career worth having will serve the spirit.
Prepare for interviews ahead of time by preparing questions, showing up early, and being put together.
Continue to work hard and push for more.
Every one of us only has ourselves; nobody else will wake up looking through your eyes, feeling with your heart, or cuddling with your teddy bear…hopefully. Live your life for you.
Work to live. Do not live to work. Your entire life cannot revolve around your job. Work to earn money so you can live. Do not live a lifestyle that solely centers around your job.
Find a job I love.
Show up to work prepared punctually.
Resist the criticism of those who do not have your best interests at heart. Value and accept the criticism of those who do have your best interests at heart.
Cultivate professional relationships. It’s important to know who you surround yourself with. The people around you can change your life completely, so choose wisely.
Maintain perseverance and passion in my chosen field.
It is crucial to surround oneself with individual friends or mentors who encourage growth and display no envy.
“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence.” – Calvin Coolidge.
Discipline and respect are key to success. Be considerate of how your actions impact other people.
Discipline is still showing respect when you are disrespected. Other people show their character by how they act, and having discipline is keeping your character the same when you are disrespected.
Life is hard; get a helmet.
Let go or be dragged down. People will always do things that hurt you or something that you would never do to them, but you must realize that they chose to do that, not you. You must rise above and let it go.
“People think of education as something they can finish.”
“No one is coming to save you.”
“The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man’s heart.”
Show up early.
Explore opportunities.
Find a work/life balance from personal experience or the lives of people I hope to mirror.
At an interview, be mindful of your mannerisms, words, and how you dress. The employer does not know you yet so that they will judge based on the first impression.
Understanding a company’s values can help answer questions like “How would you best fit in this role?” or “Why would you be good for this job?”
Always value your time over money.
Get out of your comfort zone to learn new things.
Do something you love if you must do it 40 hours a week.
Kindness and compromise will take you a long way.
Work hard and compete, and you will be successful in life.
Never be afraid to chase your dreams.
Always be confident.
Set goals on how to measure your success.
Learn to forgive your mistakes. Learning from your mistakes gives you the opportunity for self-reflection.
Always give one hundred and ten percent and work hard at the task you receive.
Always treat your employer with respect, and they will respect you.
Pick something I love doing and make good money while doing it.
Start work at a young age.
Participate in continuous learning.
Good integrity is the best way to build trust in any profession.
Practice interviews.
Be persistent in getting your prospective employer’s attention. After applying, send follow-up calls to ensure the hiring manager knows your name and confirms that they will check your application. Two weeks of applications and calls and eventually a walk-in got me an interview and the job all on the same day.
Review and adhere to policy. Ignore anyone who tells you, “Oh, we don’t have to do that,” because they will never be promoted to anything more than a base-level employee. Read and ask questions to best understand the company you work for and its specific ways of working.
Show up and express yourself to others.
Show up early.
Have all your equipment.
Be friendly to others.
Be aware of how you hold yourself on the field and in the dugout.
Work Ethics involves what you do behind the scenes, such as working extra hours and doing the right thing when no one is there to hold you accountable.
Work Ethics are something you should never be satisfied with.
Dress to impress.
Find purpose in what I do.
Always do my best.
Never expect perfection from any job.
Keep your work life and personal life separate.
Find your why in the job. Remember why you wanted this, and when you feel like giving up, go back to that reason.
Work harder than everyone else because having a good work ethic is key to gaining
respect from others.
Choose a career path that aligns with your passions and interests.
Do not let the fear of failing stop you from pursuing your hopes and dreams.
Treat others how you want to be treated.
Pursue your calling, even if it pushes you out of your comfort zone.
Be a thermostat, not a thermometer. Like a thermostat, you can change the temperature of a room, but don’t be a thermometer and let the room’s temperature change you. My attitude can change a room; I am a thermostat.
No matter what others say or do, how I respond is the only thing that matters.
Choose a career that means something to you; it should be based on your passions.
Keep learning something new and try making yourself look better than other candidates.
Your resume should highlight your strengths and weaknesses and have good references.
Be open to change.
Develop soft skills.
Track achievements that have proven relevant to life and beneficial for a career.
Clear and effective communication promotes collaboration and correctly transfers ideas and goals between people.
Seek regular feedback and reflect on past experiences.
Maintain a healthy work-life balance.
Seek continuous learning.
Learn from past failures.
Proper preparation prevents poor performance.
Grit is a common component in the lives of some of the most successful people in athletics and beyond. Grit can be defined as “never giving up, grinding through adversity, finding a way to make it happen, and not leaning into excuses.”
Nothing can replace good ol’ sweat equity and earning opportunity the old-fashioned way, which is outworking everybody else. I may not be the most gifted or the most talented, and that’s ok, but there’s never an excuse to be outworked.
“Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.”
“If you love what you do you’ll never work a day in your life.”
“Learn to love to practice” and “fall in love with the process” of being exceptional.
Be as efficient as possible.
Volunteer in the industry in which you’d like to work.
Be able to get the best grades possible.
Say it is not impossible and set about making it happen.
Be punctual.
Work hard and give your best effort.
Maintain integrity and a strong character.
Always be knowledgeable about the company or organization that you wish to work for.
Understand that honesty is key.
The connections I make will get me ahead of the game.
Learn to think on your feet.
Prepare for anything that can be thrown your way.
Pay attention to detail.
Do the work with silent integrity.
Willingness over capability, because everyone is capable, but not everyone is willing.
If you don’t believe you are something or at least have the potential to be, no one will.
You have to be a champion before you get to become a champion.
“One cannot teach unless he himself is still learning.”- Confucius.
“If money didn’t exist, what would you do with your day?” Some folks would say something similar to “sit around and play video games all day.” Don’t be that person. How would you contribute to society? To Nature? To your family/community? Take whatever it is and pursue a career with it. I’d garden and raise animals and live self-sufficiently.
Be willing to go the extra mile to validate yourself and set yourself apart from your competition.
Finish school.
Go to trade school or take the college route.
Live the life of your dreams.
Never depend on anybody else.
Pick a career that genuinely makes me happy and causes me to want to get out of bed in the morning.
Don’t be a know-it-all. Be humble. You can always learn; never stop learning.
Have a good work ethic, don’t procrastinate.
You will get out of it what you put into it.
Use proper language.
Dress appropriately.
Have a positive attitude.
Setting goals is an excellent approach to creating clear, realistic expectations that assist in staying focused on what is essential.
When creating your goals, consider these questions: are my goals specific, realistic, measurable, and relevant? Asking yourself these questions when creating goals is essential for providing direction. Specific goals clearly outline what you want to achieve. Realistic goals are achievable within your time frame. Measurable goals give a way to track your progress. Relevant goals ensure alignment with your overall objective.
Leaving your comfort zone fosters personal growth by pushing you to adapt to new situations, build resilience, and learn new things.
Give your all when you are able.
Get out of your comfort zone and take a risk even if you are unsure of the outcome.
Take breaks.
When you do uncomfortable things, you show yourself and others that you can do anything, and that determination is the key to ultimate success.
Actively embody, with intent, the qualities and outcomes I desire.
If I seek workplace recognition, I need to produce notable work. If I want respect, I must extend respect to others.
My grandmother would encourage me to read and reflect on a particular Bible verse. She would say, “You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you” (Philippians 4:13, King James).
Be a champion for those who cannot be champions for themselves.
“Having over-the-top positive nice feedback can harm your performance, it can make it very difficult for you to climb up, difficult to kind of know where you stand, what you should do better, what you should stop doing, but can also damage people in ways that we often don’t think about. It can affect their reputations outside of the interaction context” (Tessa West – TEDx).
Building a successful path requires discovering your passion, which proves difficult yet necessary for creating effective path-building strategies.
Let go of uncertainty and fear.
A strong foundation of knowledge and critical thinking skills is essential to stand out among other candidates. These qualities provide an edge in securing opportunities in competitive fields.
When you prioritize learning and personal growth, your professional success becomes achievable and enables potential opportunities that have been impossible before.
Just do it. Continue moving ahead by taking purposeful steps.
Learn to play the long game in life. Playing the long game in life is one of the most important pieces of advice because it inspires a mindset rooted in patience and resilience.
Prioritize actions that align with my overall goals in life rather than falling into distractions and temporary pleasures.
“Listen more than you talk. Nobody learned anything by hearing themselves speak” (Richard Branson).
Surround myself with the right people who inspire and challenge me. You are who you surround yourself with, the people in your life influence your actions and mindset.
Is what I’m doing today getting me closer to where I want to be tomorrow?
Find a career that will help you change the world, not just your financial situation.
“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough” (Oprah Winfrey).
Be prepared. Have everything ready to go versus running back and forth to grab things. This reassures my clients that I am professional at my job, increasing the likelihood of them becoming repeat clients.
Being prepared gives me those extra couple minutes I may not have had otherwise, ensuring I do my best work.
Understand the importance of teamwork. Cooperating improved our work relationships and helped the company continue to grow.
Speak up. Advocating for myself or someone else, whether expressing my ideas, setting boundaries, or asking for help, is often a key to success.
Always keep learning.
Be open to feedback and criticism. Receiving feedback is a part of every aspect of life, whether it is good or bad. What you do with that information can shape you and help you grow into a respected employee and, maybe one day, a respected employer.
Speak up.
Consistency shows dedication and effort.
Asking for help does not show that you are incapable; it does the opposite. It shows that you have the courage and determination to learn.
If you truly want it, you can achieve it.
Stay accountable for your actions.
Prioritize tasks and continuously try to learn.
Set clear goals.
Celebrate the big and the small wins.
A hand-up is not a handout. “There is no such thing as a self-made man. You will reach your goals only with the help of others” (George Shinn).
Take things one step at a time.
Love what I do and know when to move on from a position that is not fulfilling anymore.
No job is insignificant; respect every title.
Find the job that best suits you.
Do what makes you happy. Other people’s opinions should never stop you from doing what you love.
Never give up when things get too harsh, hard, or challenging.
We would not value where we are and how we have developed ourselves if we had all lived without adversity. I would not see myself as a kind, compassionate person who wants to help people around me if I had not experienced some life-altering events and setbacks.
Do not be afraid to ask, whether it is asking questions or asking for help.
Keep an open mind and be willing to learn because you won’t always know everything.
You are never too old to start or start over.
Life is always changing. Count on that, no matter what. Be willing to learn and change to keep up.
Focus on progress rather than perfection.
Embrace lifelong learning to stay adaptable and innovative. This means continuously seeking new knowledge and skills throughout your professional life. This approach is crucial in today’s fast-paced society, where businesses constantly evolve.
Take care of your well-being to maintain energy and motivation. This can sustain energy and enthusiasm for careers, leading to long-term success and fulfillment while maintaining a balanced home life.
Build a strong professional network. This is crucial. It can help you by opening doors to new opportunities and providing support during challenging times at work, ensuring you are never alone in your journey.
When not preoccupied with achieving perfection, you are more inclined to take risks and explore new methods.
The journey is just as important as the destination, and with the right mindset and support, you can navigate your career path with confidence and resilience.
Develop skills that can be used in different careers.
Explore your passion.
Recognize that a job is something you tolerate, and a career is something you love.
Do not settle. Life is too short to do a job you hate and do not have a passion for just for the sake of a job.
Show up early and leave late.
Dress for the job you want in the future. You only get one shot at a first impression.
Network.
Know myself and be confident.
Have an excellent work ethic and skills.
You can’t pour from an empty cup.
Be like a rubber band and flex. If you can go with the flow, you will be a desired employee.
Be a lifelong learner.
Show your potential every day.
Leave your problems at home.
Always be willing to learn and grow continually.
Find a mentor.
Focus on the 3 D’s: dedication, devotion, and discipline.
Be dedicated to goals, professionally and personally. Reach them by keeping them at the forefront. Write them down on sticky notes and place them where they are visible daily.